Jimmer Fredette Jokes

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  1. Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Jimmer Fredette pajamas
  2. Jimmer Fredette is the reason Waldo is hiding.
  3. When Jimmer Fredette crosses the street, the cars look both ways.
  4. Jimmer Fredette can win a game of Connect-4 in only 3 moves
  5. Jimmer Fredette is what Willis was talking about.
  6. Jimmer Fredette can give himself CPR.
  7. Time waits for no man, unless that man is Jimmer Fredette.
  8. On a trip to Italy, Jimmer Fredette rested against a building for 3 seconds. That building is now known as the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
  9. Jimmer Fredette invented the word ‘indestructible’.
  10. If it looks like chicken, smells like chicken, tastes like chicken, but Jimmer Fredette says it’s steak, then it’s steak.
  11. “Jimmer Fredete: The Movie 3-D was considered by Warner Brothers, but the technology to create the visual effects will never be possible.
  12. Jimmer 3:16, For God so loved the world that he sent Jimmer Fredette, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
  13. Jimmer Fredette once killed two stones with one bird.
  14. March Madness has been renamed to Jimmer Madness.
  15. When Jimmer Fredette was born, he was given the name The Jimmer
  16. Jimmer Fredette can swim through ice.
  17. Jimmer Fredette knows no boundaries, the boundaries know him.
  18. Not even Kanye interrupts The Jimmer.
  19. Jimmer Fredette knows the unknown author.
  20. Jimmer Fredette is the eighth wonder of the world.
  21. Jimmer Fredette’s PC never crashes.
  22. Live Simply, Love Generously, Care Deeply, Speak Kindly, Leave the rest to The Jimmer.
  23. TNT named a show after the arms of Jimmer Fredette; Law and Order.
  24. Jimmer 24:15 “…But as for me and my house, we will serve The Jimmer.”
  25. WWJD: What Would Jimmer Do
  26. Some kids pee their name in the snow, Jimmer Fredette pees his name in concrete.
  27. Jimmer Fredette’s tears could cure cancer… if he ever cried.
  28. Jimmer Fredette doesn’t chew gum, he chews tin foil.
  29. Every knee shall bow and every tongue confess that He is The Jimmer.
  30. Jimmer Fredette’s account was terminated at match.com because nobody is a match for Him.
  31. When Jimmer Fredette was in Junior High his English teacher assigned an essay on “What is courage?”. He received an A+ for turning in a blank paper with his name at the top.
  32. The earth is rotating because Jimmer Fredette is breathing.
  33. The last digit of PI is Jimmer Fredette.
  34. Everything that has a beginning, has an end…except Jimmer Fredette.
  35. Jimmer Fredette can see UV light.
  36. Never, ever name a Hurricane Jimmer Fredette.
  37. I before E except after Jimmer Fredette.
  38. Jimmer Fredette can hear his phone ring on silent.
  39. Jimmer Fredette can use a shake weight without looking gay.
  40. The reason the Antichrist has not yet come is because Jimmer Fredette still walks the earth.
  41. Jimmer Fedette is the only man in the world to defeat a brick wall at the game of tennis.
  42. If the Army could recruit Jimmer Fredette, it truly would be an Army of One.
  43. Jimmer Fredette’s enemies list Him as the emergency contact.
  44. Jimmer Fredette has appeared in every single Star Wars movie. He played The Force.
  45. Jimmer Fredette will not taste death, death will taste Jimmer.
  46. Faith without Jimmer is dead.
  47. Ask not what The Jimmer can do for you, but what you can do for The Jimmer.
  48. Brigham Young University is set to be renamed Jimmer Fredette University.
  49. Jimmer Fredette’s hand can beat a Royal Flush.
  50. Facebook was renamed to Jimmerbook.
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